Triad couple sees 'hand of God working wonders' in new baby, mom after cancer diagnosis during pregnancy

GREENSBORO — Sylvia Hope Wilde is now home.

The 10th child of Keith and Donielle Wilde, who doctors advised they abort when Donielle was diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer during pregnancy, was born Nov. 6. She weighed 7 lbs., 1 oz., and measured 20 in. long.

"Sylvia is doing excellent," Donielle said Nov. 11. "I feel amazing! It was very fun seeing all our kids get so excited meeting their new baby sister!"

Sylvia spent some time in NICU being monitored for some fluid in her lungs, rapid breathing and other precautionary issues. Donielle was able to hold her daughter for the first time the day after she was born.

The family was able to bring her home Nov. 10.

Because her fifth daughter was born via C-section, Donielle had a CT scan of her lungs, but no cancer or blood clots were found. She will have a full body scan in a couple weeks once she has healed to check the rest of her body, she said.

"So far, there is no sign of cancer in Donielle.... This is miraculous," Keith wrote. "All the tissue sent for testing was negative."

Doctors removed a nodule that was a match of the tumor found earlier this year on her ovary, but they suspect that it was not new but was outside of the area they could see during the initial surgery in June, he added.

Donielle and Keith said they are very thankful for everyone's continued prayers.

"So many mini-miracles are coming to light. It is truly incredible to see the hand of God working wonders in response to the prayers and love of so many wonderful people," Keith said.

— Catholic News Herad, Picture provided by Keith Wilde

Triad couple trusts in God throughout cancer diagnosis, high-risk pregnancy

The following is the original story that appeared in the Oct. 10 edition of the Catholic News Herald.

GREENSBORO — Keith and Donielle Wilde know what it means to live 'Jesus, I trust in You' every day. Married for 17 years, parents to nine children under the age of 12, and the owners of a concrete business in Summerfield, they rely heavily on their faith in Jesus Christ and the Church.

But shortly after Donielle became pregnant with her 10th child in April, doctors found that her breast cancer, which had been in remission for the past nine years, had returned – and their faith was put to the test again.

"The beginning of this year was extremely difficult for Keith and me," Donielle recalls. "The business, financial stressors, and 11 of us living under the same roof had us both feeling maxed out. In our minds, we were sure that God had given us all that we could handle.

"However, God would soon reveal that He had other plans. Since we were using NFP (Natural Family Planning), we were more than a little surprised to find out we were pregnant with our 10th child. After sharing our feelings of joy and excitement, we began to wonder how God could think we were able to handle more. But He never let us down before. He always provided for us in the past, and we were confident this time would be no different."

So they accepted the unexpected pregnancy with joy and prepared to welcome their 10th child, a fifth daughter.

But when Donielle went to her OB-GYN for a routine ultrasound at nine weeks into her pregnancy, life took another unexpected turn. The ultrasound revealed a large mass on one of her ovaries – a discovery they would have never made "if it weren't for the new life growing right beside it."

"Once again God had shown His light for all to see what was happening in the darkness," she notes with a smile.

The tumor was diagnosed as cancerous. At 16 weeks safely into her pregnancy, Donielle underwent surgery to remove it.

"With God's grace we never lost our peace in spite of all that was happening," she says. "In fact, our faith grew stronger and our hope for a healthy pregnancy and delivery was in the forefront of our prayers, as well as all those praying for us."

Tests revealed that the tumor was not ovarian cancer, but Stage IV breast cancer which had metastasized. The breast cancer she had successfully fought in 2005 had returned, and doctors told her that the hormones produced from her pregnancy were speeding its growth.

Both the ovarian specialist and the oncologist strongly advised Donielle to begin treatment immediately. She had two options: abort their daughter, then undergo surgery and chemotherapy, or undergo aggressive chemotherapy throughout her pregnancy and risk a possible miscarriage.

"It felt as if the moment was frozen in time," Donielle says. "Looking back, it was as if we were in the midst of a spiritual battlefield, and the forces of good and evil were intently watching to see what our choice would be ... but in reality there was no hesitation in making our decision. We would not abort our child or place her in harm's way for any reason."

Keith recalls that day when they met with the oncologist and received the diagnosis.

"As a father it is very strange to sit across from someone, at arm's length, and listen to that person tell you to kill your child. I know that is a very blunt description of what took place – but it is also accurate. I realized that he did not see it that way. The doctor is a good man, kind, a father. He is a competent professional and very dedicated to doing all he can to save Donielle's life. But he simply did not see the child in her womb as a person. The pregnancy was a condition to be dealt with so that Donielle's treatment could begin.

"I honestly don't think he was prepared for our response. There were no tears, no breakdowns, no anger. We calmly accepted the news, and calmly refused the abortion. He spoke with us at length to make sure we understood the seriousness of the diagnosis, sharing survival statistics and life expectancies for cases similar to ours.

"We never wavered."

The chemotherapy-only option also had a down side, the Wildes recall, as the treatment was not specific to her type of cancer and there was just as much a possibility of it harming the baby as of being effective.

"This too was unacceptable, we would not endanger our child," Keith says. "It was then that we presented him with a third option: focus on delivering a healthy baby and then treat Donielle. It was a four-month window of time from diagnosis to earliest possible delivery date, and even though cancer can be very unpredictable, this did not seem like a very long time to delay treatment. After all, we wouldn't even have known about the tumor if it had not been for the baby's ultrasound. Four months or four years could easily have gone by without us ever knowing."

So Donielle and Keith decided to postpone treatment for her cancer until after their daughter is born.

"My doctors, husband and I agreed to a C-section in early November, which is four weeks prior to my due date, followed by the start of any suggested cancer treatments," she says. "Further treatment will be determined upon results of testing after she is born."

Keith explains that for Donielle, all three options have the same result.

"It is unknown what will happen with her cancer, none of the treatments offer any guarantee of success but only the possibility of prolonging her life by an unknown amount of time." But for their unborn daughter, Keith said, "only one option gives her the best chance to be born healthy and live out her natural life."

"How could we end that life, a life of endless hope and possibility, in exchange for the mere chance of extending Donielle's by a few years?" he said. "If we chose to abort the baby and sometime after Donielle passed away, both of their lives would be lost. We have all heard stories of cancer survivors who are miraculously cancer free. What if that happened for us – but we had aborted our child?"

They don't know if Donielle's cancer has spread in the intervening months since her last CT scan in June, but Donielle and her doctors remain optimistic.

Dr. Lewis Lipscomb Jr. is a pro-life OB-GYN who is caring for Donielle and the unborn baby, and he has dealt with life-threatening situations like this before.

"I have cared for courageous moms who have fought through cancer during their pregnancies – including women with breast cancer, melanoma, lymphoma, cervical cancer and uterine cancer," Lipscomb says.

"Donielle is doing very well," he said. "I performed an operation on her early in the second trimester to remove the tumor involving her ovary. We closely monitored her progesterone levels following that, to ensure that the pregnancy had adequate hormonal support. She has also developed blood clots in both lungs, for which she is receiving blood thinner."

Despite the medical complications, Lipscomb says Donielle's baby is developing and growing normally, and he is pleased with her progress.

"Aside from needing to be born a few weeks early, I expect her to do very well," he says.

Donielle is expected to deliver the baby via C-section in early November. Immediately following the delivery, Lipscomb, along with the gynecological oncology specialist, will perform a staging operation which will hopefully help them to remove, as much as possible, any remaining tumor.

"Donielle is a courageous and prayerful woman," Lipscomb says. "She has faced multiple life-threatening and life-changing situations with genuine grace. She is an authentic witness for life to everyone she encounters.

"I personally have come to appreciate even more the sacrificial nature of motherhood," he says, and he asks for everyone's prayers for the Wilde family and the medical team, for the safe delivery of their unborn daughter, and for Donielle's future cancer treatment.

Says Donielle, "We feel very hopeful that our little girl will be healthy and strong. We've accepted in our hearts whatever it is God has willed for my life. Whether it be healing from cancer, strength in suffering or a peaceful death, my heart remains at peace knowing Christ and our Blessed Mother will give my family and me all the grace we need to live it out."

Both Keith and Donielle say they thank God for the grace to help them persevere, giving them gifts beyond measure.

"We have always had a focus on our marriage, and that it consists of three persons – God being at our center," Donielle says. "Allowing Christ to navigate has blessed us with an incredible life of highs and lows, filled with countless blessings and tremendous sacrifice. By fully trusting in Christ, with the sacraments and the Holy Church it is possible to face all of life's challenges with the peace of Our Lord."

Keith says, "Of course, as Catholics our decision not to abort and to postpone treatment was rooted in our faith. We are pro-life by virtue of our Christianity. We have placed God at the center of our marriage, and he has blessed us profoundly. Now he has given us a cross to bear – who are we to say no?"

As Catholics, the Wildes believe in protecting the sanctity of life at all stages – but it's not just an abstract concept for them. It gets more real to them every day of this pregnancy.

"We have told all our children I have cancer and have explained to them the importance of prayer for our unborn baby and my health," Donielle says. "We have also found this as a great opportunity to educate them more deeply on the sacredness of life in every circumstance. We feel they are comforted by the example of peace and hope reflected in the way Keith and I are living out this unknown part of our life. Children often respond to crisis based on what they see others do."

She and Keith believe that is just another reason faith and communication are vital in times like this. It is a way of teaching their children virtue at a young age, setting the foundation for adulthood.

"As husband and father, I feel called to be a source of strength for my family," Keith says. "In these times, everything feels 'supercharged' with meaning and added importance, and I often struggle with a need to convey that to my young children.

"At the same time, I don't want them – or anyone who knows of our situation – to be fearful or terrified of what may happen. Instead, I want them to pray and to be hopeful. I want them to be confident in God's mercy and love. I want them to grow and strengthen their faith."

"These little lives – all 10 of them – we feel are blessings from God," Donielle says. "As I feel our baby girl kicking inside my womb throughout the day, it is a constant reminder to me of God's love."

She recalls a recent homily from their pastor, Father Joseph Mack at St. Paul the Apostle Church, in which he encouraged parishioners to "go into the vineyards."

"What does that mean? It means go forth and live the Gospel, do works in faith striving to imitate Christ," Donielle says. "Being Catholic is more than words to be spoken, more than books to read, more than places to go – it is how we are called to live our lives.

"What better way to imitate Christ than by repeating Our Lord's own words, 'This is My Body which I have given up for you' and then living out those words in love, for Him, with joy in our hearts?"

Keith adds, "Someday, whether Donielle is here with us or not, everyone will be able to meet our little girl. She will grow and do incredible things, she will love and be loved and she will be a part of this world. We will sing her happy birthdays and wish her Merry Christmases, she will learn to crawl and walk and run. She will bring into the world gifts given to her by God. Who knows what those gifts may be?"

Donielle believes each of us needs to challenge ourselves: "What is God is asking of me, personally, to better live out the Gospels? Whatever the answer may be, I ask you to fearlessly give God your 'fiat,' your 'yes'."

The Wildes have said "yes" to God's latest gift in their lives, and no matter what may come in November, they are confident that their faith will keep their family strong. Their baby daughter – whom they have named Sylvia Hope – is already proof of that.

— SueAnn Howell, senior reporter