Obedience is not a trait that has ever come particularly easy for me. I have a stubborn and somewhat contrary nature. I’m also excessively curious and like to know the “why” behind everything. And I will admit to a rather rebellious streak, as well, which means that telling me to do something is often a guaranteed way to make me not want to do it. I often thank the Lord that I was given such patient and loving parents, or else I might not have survived my adolescence and young adulthood.
Coming to the Catholic Church in my mid-20s required a lot of trust in things I didn’t fully understand, things I may never fully understand this side of heaven. I had to accept many things in my heart long before I would begin to get a hold of them with my mind, and even 10 years later I am still amazed when a new piece of the faith suddenly “clicks” for me.
I recently read “Inside the Light: Understanding the Message of Fatima” by Sister Angela de Fatima Coelho. Before reading this book, I knew only the basic story of the apparitions of the Blessed Virgin that took place in Fatima, Portugal, in the early 20th century: how Our Lady appeared to three young shepherd children over a series of several months, culminating in the spectacular “miracle of the sun” that was witnessed by many thousands of people.
Sister Angela presents many beautiful ideas to meditate upon, but one that struck me particularly comes from the first request the Virgin Mary made of the children. When she first appeared to them, they did not know who she was, only that she was a beautiful lady who was “dressed in the light of God.” She said to them, “I have come to ask you to come here six months in succession on the 13th day, at this same hour. Later on, I will who tell you who I am and what I want.”
No introduction, no explanation, just the request that they keep showing up for her. And perhaps one of the miracles: The children obeyed! No questioning, no arguing, no bargains. The children simply did what she asked of them and were rewarded with incredible graces; so much so that two of them, Francisco and Jacinta Marto, became the two youngest non-martyred canonized saints.
Are we as adults capable of such obedience and trust, even knowing ahead of time the rewards that are promised?
It’s easy to see the importance of obedience in children. As their caregivers, we might try to make sure that they brush their teeth, eat their vegetables, get plenty of sleep. We know that if they follow these instructions then they will thrive in life long before they are grown enough to understand the reasons behind it. Hygiene and a healthy diet are not made more or less effective based on a child’s comprehension of them; it’s more important that they just do what they are told.
Spiritually, we are all children in the eyes of God, and sometimes we are called to trust and obey even if we don’t understand the “why” first. As we mature spiritually, God may enlighten our hearts more as to the necessity of certain practices, but that does not mean we should wait for that enlightenment before starting.
It reminds me of a quote by C.S. Lewis from his book “Mere Christianity.” In the chapter about charity, Lewis says, “Do not waste time bothering about whether you ‘love’ your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this, we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him.” Sometimes action must precede feeling. How many of us have struggled through a new exercise regime or a healthier diet, yet only come to fully appreciate the benefits many weeks after we begin?
I do not have the most disciplined of temperaments. I can be rather lenient with myself and easily make excuses when I am not in the mood to do something. Once again, I’m grateful for the forbearance of my parents while I was growing up, especially during my teenage years, but I am also grateful for the rules and expectations they imposed, the obedience they required in certain things. Obedience was something I needed to practice before I had the maturity to appreciate the reason for it.
The Holy Catholic Church has given us certain “rules,” such as the obligation of attending Sunday Mass every week, for our own well-being. Just as God gave us the Sabbath for our need and benefit, and even made it a commandment that we rest one day a week, so the Church says we must fulfill certain duties because they are necessary for the health of our souls. In various apparitions, Our Lady has made requests of us, as she made of the shepherd children at Fatima, such as praying a daily rosary and the First Saturday Devotions.
Do we trust God? Are we willing to be obedient to Him, to the decrees of His Church, and to the requests of His Mother? Are we willing to give Him our lives and our hearts? As Sister Angela says in her book, “the things of God don’t always work according to our rules and regulations. Often, He asks for faith FIRST, and only then does He offer us the understanding we seek. … With some things the heart must understand before the mind does.”
Kathryn Evans Heim is an author and wife living outside Salisbury, where she gardens, raises chickens, experiments with cooking and reads too many books. Find her work at www.evanswriting.com.